Leandie Buys, Relationship Therapist and Clinical Sexologist


The search for a healthy, satisfying relationship can be a frustrating and even heart wrenching experience. Failed relationships can erode confidence, leaving you feeling defeated and even cynical. A pattern of betrayals and disappointments can heighten these feelings and make it hard to open your heart and trust again. Divorce and break-ups are very common in our culture, and people get their hearts broken every day. Many people are marrying later in life, and about half of those who marry will end up divorced, once again trying to navigate the complicated world of dating. Thankfully, there is hope and a way forward. With the compassionate support and guidance of an experienced and nonjudgmental therapist, it is possible for you to dispel unhealthy patterns, build on your strengths and begin to feel good about yourself and all that you have to offer another.

3 rigid beliefs about dating and relationships that are damaging your love life

No, really! Is this something you have thought of or said aloud recently? It is followed by working hard on making yourself presentable and then taking the time to get to know that person.

Read about 3 rigid beliefs about dating and relationships that are damaging your love life. Find out how your Liberty Counselling Luxembourg. MENU 1- I need to feel % confident and centred to start dating again.

Dating is basically like a job interview. Except it can last several years. And either of you can just get up and leave at any time without explanation. And unresolved childhood issues. Now that I think of it, dating is actually way more frightening than a job interview. This kind of anxiety can be a real downer for you — and a great way to drive someone away.

“Six months into our relationship we needed couples’ counselling”

You do not just live in a world, but a world lives in you Frederick Buechner. Click here if you are looking for singles counselling. I work by initially holding a consultation session with you. Based on our consultation, I put together a specific relationship counselling plan for you. The plan will include specific relationship topics I will cover during each session that are relevant for your needs, as well, as a timeline of our work together.

We then get started.

I’m used to dating guys who are about my age, at most – two years older a registered counsellor at BI Malangwane Counselling in Midrand.

The aim of dating coaching is to help people be more conscious in their dating , so that, with enhanced awareness, their activities and choices better serve them to attract and create a successful love relationship. Remember we have a desire and a drive for closeness in relationship and therefore, a desire and drive NOT to lose them. Often, in an effort to not lose them, we start to discard parts of ourselves that we think they might not like or that might not fit with elements of who they are.

We may do this consciously or unconsciously, but the result is that it becomes harder and harder to hold onto our authenticity and know who we are in the relationship. Conscious dating is about being aware and awake to who you are and what you want and actually, purposefully, looking for that. Unfortunately, we often are so unconscious in our dating that we just fall into relationships rather than actually figuring out whether or not the relationship will work for us.

Being conscious in our dating means taking the time to be still with ourselves and figuring out who we are and what we want. The hottest, most conscious thing you can do is to be present and attentive to the person sitting across from you. Yes, this includes turning off your phone! Look into their eyes. Listen to what they’re saying, maybe even repeat back to them what they’re saying. Use your active listening skills. Be attentively interested in who is sitting across from you.

Empowering Dating Coaching

An explosive world of pain and passion! The incredible highs of meeting someone who is attractive, engaging and seems to be interested — and the dreadful lows of hurtful arguments, unanswered phone calls and perhaps most insulting of all — being ghosted. Is there any way we can protect ourselves from the heartache – and even perhaps the elation too — which can so easily distract us from other parts of our lives we could be focusing on? As someone who has been counselling people in relationships for many years, and indeed being in a relationship myself, I believe that there are some strategies we can adopt that can help to keep control of our lives so that our dating life is safe and healthy.

You meet someone you are very attracted to — they have everything you have wanted, looks, personality, charm, even money perhaps — they could be your dream date and you haven’t dated for a while, and guess what? They feel the same way about you.

Your local relationship & marriage specialist, counselling individuals, couples blended families, married couples, dating couples, complicated relationships.

Not true. Here are some of the most common. You might be struggling to cope with feelings of sadness, loss, guilt or anger and they in turn can have a negative impact on your self-esteem and confidence. A counsellor is like your very own private support network. By exploring your past relationships and looking into your family history, you can start to take control of your life and make better and more conscious choices for your future relationships.

Fear of rejection or judgement or issues surrounding self-confidence could be holding you back. We often convince ourselves certain things about relationships and what they mean. Counselling can help challenge any limiting beliefs you may be subconsciously holding onto. Working with a counsellor can help you develop a better relationship with yourself. The most important relationship you can have in life, first and foremost, is always going to be the one you have with yourself.

Take control of your dating life

It was a couple of months into seeing a relationship therapist when PR executive Emily, 33, from London lost control. I just need you to listen. I needed to have space where I could be angry at him without him being angry and defensive back. The reason Emily was so angry? Her boyfriend had cheated on her, three months into their relationship.

The aim of dating coaching is to help people be more conscious in their dating, so that, with enhanced awareness, their activities and choices.

What are you looking for in a partner? Have you found yourself answering this question in a similar manner? Where to start? There are two components: Deal Makers and Deal Breakers. Go back to your list of your values that are important to you. Really look at it and pull out values that are the most important and define you. These values are the foundation for your Deal Makers list. Write these down in a list format in a column on the left-hand side…then start writing beside each value how this can be practiced.

For example, you can have the value of compassion.

Why My Boyfriend & I Started Couples Counseling 6 Months Into Our Relationship

Right away, Kurt and I agreed on almost everything. We had met through a mutual friend in , but we didn’t start dating until we came across each other on Bumble a few years later. That’s when we discovered that we were on the same page when it came to most of life’s most important decisions — what movies to watch, what to order on Seamless, the breed of dog we want to adopt someday. But there was one way we were very different: I knew I wanted kids one day, and he knew he didn’t.

While neither of us are at points in our lives where procreation is an urgent matter I’m 24, and he’s 28 , knowing that this major difference could eventually end our relationship freaked us out.

Page 1: If you’re dating a ‘loser’, you may recognize in your partner some of these Try Online Counseling: Get Personally Matched.

Singles And Dating If you are happy being single that is a very positive place to be. There are many advantages to not having a partner — for example you can be more focused on your career or studies. At times though, it is not easy always being single in a society that often promotes being in a couple as the status quo. For some people joining a dating site provides a quick solution; but for others this alone does not provide all the answers.

However, there are ways of breaking out of being alone to having healthy relationships where you are in a strong position to finding the partner you desire. At Take Action Counselling one of the strategies we might look at is to take a relationship inventory with you. This would be for you and your counsellor together to make a list of all the people you have had relationships with or dated. This gives you important information about what kind of person you are attracted to and is drawn to you including:.

You and your counsellor would also have time together to explore your thoughts and feelings about relationships, attraction, and the dating process.

Celebs Go Dating viewers divided on the new couples counselling segments

The modern dating world is complicated. But there are ways to make it easier dare I say even enjoyable and to increase your success. Have you been dating the wrong people? Do the people you do meet have commitment issues, or maybe they are unavailable, not wanting the same things as you, or they turn out to be emotionally unhealthy or not capable of having a healthy relationship. A dating coach can help!

Online dating is one of the only ways to meet new people during Why Relationships Matter · Find counselling to strengthen relationships.

I was sitting on the sofa crying, when my partner Nikki came out of the bedroom. We loved each other, but were having some issues. Couples’ counselling seemed like a logical next step. Whether you’re married or not, relationships can of course be challenging. But it was more than that. I had to try to fight for the relationship. In the following days, I asked myself how we got to this point. New couples like us should be spending their time making out in public, having loads of sex, going on romantic dates and annoying their friends with how much they lovingly talk about each other, right?

Instead, Nikki and I were constantly arguing and coordinating our schedules to meet with a therapist. Perhaps, we should have seen it coming.

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